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Temple of the Flaming Pistachio Shell


Who are we? That's a very good question, even if it is rhetorical. Sometimes I wonder if we ourselves have figured it out yet. Well, the answer, to the best of our knowledge, is that we are a Discordian cabal. We don't have a large number of members, but we hope that will change in the future. We are based in Rockville, Maryland. I (the writer) am the Episkopos; my wholly holey Discordian name is Suunbea, plus about six lines of titles and acronyms. Enough about me. 

We are devoted to fighting the Illuminati, social conditioning, brainwashing, and all of those other nasty things. You might ask yourself (and you might not) how we do that. We do it by doing the opposite of what They expect us to. We do NOT follow the programmed trends on MTV, we hack, we phreak, we throw the wrenches into the works. You might say we "mess things up". If you did say so, you'd be mostly right. The fact is, we only harrass those who deserve it. If you are here, you probably don't deserve it, so don't worry. We aren't arbitrary. Of course, that's not all we do. It's not even our main activity. The most important thing we do is to go out into the world, or in this case the internet, and spread Discordian wisdom. We want everyone to throw out of their minds what the Illuminati have implanted and programmed, thereby enabling free thought. Destruction of the creations of the Illuminati is one way to start.

We are also intrigued with Eris, the goddess of confusion, and her doings. We don't do [what They consider to be]"bad" things for no reason, and those two bits of information set us a little apart from the Anarchists. We are against all government, but not for the same reasons as them. We are against govenment because we know the Illuminati are behind it.

Without Us, and our type, the game of chess the Illuminati are playing with everyone would be one-sided. We are the black game pieces, the knights and bishops, instead of the pawns. We are the loose stones in the road, the fence sitters, the guys in black trench coats, sitting in the corners of bars. We will NOT be controled, and we want to help you escape it as well.

Our doors are open to all, regardless of age, race, color, class, nationality, or such fickle things as popularity. If you want to join us, or just like [or don't like] what we're doing or have a question/comment, mail the cabal at, saying so. We'd be glad to have you. Good help is hard to dig up, so we won't ask too many questions.

Currently, the members of the cabal are:

High Arch Pope, Episkopos, Suunbea

Pope in the Fifth Degree, sPOOnmAN

Keeper of the Golden Apple, The Riddler

Pope, Eurasiatica Corthos

You can mail us individually by clicking on the mailto links above.